four

four is the number today...

my baby girl turns four today

...and she couldn't be more excited

she was so excited to show me four when taking pictures last Sunday afternoon

it really was the perfect day to take some pics of them outside

it has been awhile since I took a few pics of them and I think they forgot

that "mama goes overboard in how many she takes"

because I took a ton...
I mean a whole lot of pictures
{smile}

but we had the best time

lots of laughter

silly dancing

a bit of craziness and stress at some points during the pictures when Hayley decided she was done

"done taking photos mom"

completely done she said:)

I don't blame her because I'm the first person to jet when people start taking photos

As I was going through the photos in the wee wee wee hours of the night

 I liked around 67 of them

yes 67

some were of just Madison too
which I'll save for her birthday

because how can you not take photos of both of your sweet girls

anyhoo...

Hayley Elisabeth is four today

yes four

{I keep typing that I know...perhaps I'm in denial just a little bit

...thought you should know that}

 I feel a bit rusty at writing since it has been awhile

but I wanted to blog today

to celebrate Hayley

she is my sunshine

who has a true gift of humor and silliness that I just love

we dance silly all the time together

whether in stores

at home

or in the car

it's our fun thing we do together

to make one another laugh

Hayley loves to share her gift of making others laugh...especially with Madison and I

she makes us laugh all of the time

so when she is in trouble

she makes me laugh on purpose because she thinks I'll forget and let it slide

 and there it goes...I of course laugh and can't hold it in

completely not effective when you are trying to parent just letting you know

so when I have to get it together to talk to her
without laughing,

I start laughing all over again

and then its pointless and I'm not effective

she runs our house if you can't tell

on the way home from my grandparents a couple of weeks ago

she was so goofy and if you know Hayley this is a normal thing she says

and is so proud of the fact that she toots

yep I said it

 she started praying this prayer in the car on the way home probably 50 times

not kidding

so Madison's reaction was the best...after the 50th time

H: "Dear God...thank you and bless me for tooting because I'm a tooting machine"

so after about the 50th time in a row of her praying this prayer

M says: "Dear God...please have Hayley stop praying that!"

it was so cute

she calls herself the Queen of Tooting

and she even has a King of Tooting and his name is Parker

almost on a daily basis she reminds me of these titles that Parker and her have
{King and Queen of tooting}

I told her I'm going to remember this story when she starts dating 70 years from now
{yes they are not dating until they are 76 and 74}

 this week she's been saying..."and now I will be four just like Parker"

so you can see what is important in her world:)

what I loved most about that prayer...

she was just being her... silly, fun, and cute

but most of all a kid

Hayley brings so much sunshine and kindness to us

she always has a compliment and sweet things to say to Madison and I

I love her heart and all that comes with it

her favorite color is purple

although she loves yellow and red too:)

and as I brought cupcakes to her school yesterday

all of her friends asked imediately and without even thinking about it...

"are they all purple Hayley???!!!"
she said "yes, YES!!! they are"

Hayley is our sweet dragonfly

and we are blessed every day that we have her

she is fiesty

 most definitely independent

but she also has to be around people

all.of.the.time

she loves to go on a run with me and play outside

she loves her taekwondo class

Hayley is a summer and beach girl most definitely

with the brightest of blue eyes

She doesn't know a stranger as she talks to anyone she meets

especially the people that work at Trader Joe's

she was upset one day because she forgot to tell the checkout guy this last detail of what she was sharing with him and then goes..."what was his name mama? I forgot to tell him____" 

this was after being home 45 minutes she was still talking about it

my dad calls her NST

{non stop talker}

which is very much appropriate

she even told the dentist the other day she had 12 brothers and sisters

the hygenist immediately came out to verify with me

and I had a horrified look on my face when she asked me

that the hygentist laughed pretty hard at my reaction alone

she is so proud of her sister Madison

I couldn't ask them to be any closer...they are besties

everyday as we pick Madison up from school Hayley cannot wait to run up to Madison to give her a hug...it makes me smile

she is a lover of vanilla cake and vanilla ice cream

just like her mama

she loves my homemade macaroni with fancy cheeses

feta on her salad

 mahi mahi

{I think she likes to say mahi mahi more than anything}

and always is ready for dessert after dinner

{that's from her daddy}

I can't hardly wait until she wakes up this morning as I have her room filled with balloons above her bed {only like 10 but her room looks filled when they are all above her bed...
and yes they are purple}

four of the ballons have notes tied to them

about things we love about her

she has a new stuffed giraffe hanging by it's arms from her chandi

she loves giraffes and always her must see at zoos

her giraffe she got at the San Diego Zoo last year is named Gigi
so now she has one more to add to her collection of about 5 now

I can't wait to see her face light up when she sees all the balloons

because it has been so hard for me not to tell her what her surprises are
{I'm not great at holding surprises in and neither is Hayley}

Today is the day to make her feel so special

for all the specialness she brings to us

we are so blessed and thankful for  Hayley

she is our sweetheart and sunshine that is full of life

and today we are so happy to celebrate her

when I had the girls out taking pictures Sunday it started to rain just before we were done

and when I said I'm finally done taking pictures

this was their reaction:

I love you our dragonfly

Happy Fourth Birthday

Hayley Elisabeth

I always love you
I always believe in you
and I am always proud of you
xo

intangibles

I probably have lost most of you by now...

Last night I actually did a quick blog visit looking for something on my blog

I wanted to find

and then I also found a post that i did 2 years ago this month of a video

when my youngest was 1 1/2

and I cried

that age is so sweet and I just miss it

even though I love the ages both of my girls are at right now too

it was just a reminder of how time just flies by

often before you want it to

I really miss posting on my blog

yes, I've said this before

but I really realized it more than ever last night

I miss reading my friend's blogs

I miss the connections I made with all of you

I miss many of things

but I just had to take a break from writing

sharing

posting

I just needed to live life for my family

some things are hard to say...

this past year has been wonderful for so many of things

but it also has been an extremely difficult year for my family too

that's hard to say

not just my immediate family

but also in my extended family

 and if I would have written

it would have been painful for me

that's why I stepped away

and of course because lack of time as well

I've really been off the wall busy with my family, kiddos, my business, etc.

I just couldn't make my blog a priority

 I chose to focus on other things

and I am happy with that decision

I wanted to look at my life and still appreciate the wonderful blessings

that I have no matter what

because I have so many blessings

that I'm just so thankful for

anyway,

I want to get back on track with sharing...

so as most of you know

Christmas is in my top 3 holidays of the year

the giving and celebrating family/friends is my favorite part of the year

and it also means that I have guaranteed time that my hubby is in town too:)

we have already had some wonderful christmas celebrations

a couple of weekends ago with my in-laws

this past weekend was Christmas with our friends

and i made pumpkin candied cranberry tarts

yes, I made tarts for the very first time
I loved it!

and I'm still pretty darn excited about it
although, it took me forever

I may just be going through a tart phase now
they are just so cute and pretty

obviously, I'm sidetracked with my tarts now

which I do plan on sharing the recipe because I loved it

both of the celebrations were wonderful

Christmas is one of my favorite holidays

it has been that way since I was a child

my sister and I always, always loved it

Miracle on 34th Street

and we would watch it almost on a daily basis

{almost}

yes, I've talked about that movie a lot on this blog in the past

my sis and i would watch it so much when we were younger

that I think my parents had to buy us 2 vhs tapes:)

we would literally wear this movie out:)

yes, "I believe"

and that only makes sense if you have watched the movie

So...

as I was going through my blog last night
I was reminded of my favorite quote in my very favorite Christmas movie

Miracle on 34th Street

I thought I would share it once again

 I took some Christmas photos of the girls yesterday afternoon

it was a blast

we had lots of fun

smiles

silly faces

dance moves to celebrate at the end of our little session

we all celebrated
the girls were great

actually fabulous

and wonderful

{that's because they were bribed with freezy ice pops}

we don't know how to get through a photo session without bribing in our family

just so you know...I am not above bribing to get photos :)

i almost put this picture on my virtual christmas card just to be reminded of all the silly things the girls and I do together

hopefully you will love this quote as much as I do

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

"Someday you are going to find that your way of facing this realistic world just doesn't work, and when you do, don't overlook those lovely intangibles. You'll discover those are the only things that are worthwhile."

and I found that quote true so much of this past year
hold on to those intangibles

Thank you everyone for your patience

and thank you to my fabulous friends that over the past couple of months kept asking me when I was coming back with my blog

it was just nice to hear your sweet words to me

it didn't go unnoticed

Happy Holidays!!!

"Whatever is good,

whatever brings you joy...

May it be yours during

this magical season and the

throughout the coming year."



five on april tenth

five years ago with an up and down not so fun delivery

we finally met our beautiful butterfly

Madison Ella

you arrived
with some of the strongest lungs they've heard
they said
but you had the longest eye lashes i had ever seen

i was completely in love with you

you had such beautiful petite features

and a full head of dark hair

that i just loved, loved!

after an hour or so after your birth
I was finally able to hold you

I didn't want to let you go

for anyone

even family

I wanted to cherish every single moment and study every single part on you

I think family had to remind me that they wanted to hold you too

there grew a special bond between both you and I
and Hayley and I...

with each pregnancy

 i had to have ultrasounds every 3-4 weeks

for various reasons

so the bond we had before you even arrived was so special

I wouldn't change our journey for you and hayley at all

it was all for a reason

but i still remember seeing you just 8 cells big

I was laying in the hospital room

just praying that this time was "the time" it was going to happen

Madison you are our miracle

you are such a blessing that we are so very thankful for

and when i woke up this past Sunday morning
~ your birthday ~

tears just welled up in my eyes

and i literally just cried

tears of happiness

joy

  thankfulness

and tears of just knowing i am always proud of you

i remember our journey for you so well

and I've tucked that back for many years

because when we were blessed with you

we just wanted to move forward

it became the past

and our present and future was with you

 the pain is just a distant memory

all thankfully behind us now

 yesterday you were five

and as daddy and I tucked you into bed last night

i remembered you were born about one hour and 20 minutes
before 8:45 pm

I cannot believe how quickly these past 5 years have gone by

I want to hold on tight and freeze time right now 

because i know it is going to fly by even faster

I'm so proud of you

for all that you are

and all that I see in you

for all that you have grown in just these past couple of months

with believing in yourself
having fun
and showing the "you" that we know well

as I'm typing right now

I'm thinking of the day when we found out
that we were pregnant

they warned us carefully that we were not out of the clear yet

but after three years

of things not working

I really knew you would and had to be okay

when my phone rang with them calling to give us the news
either way news

I was shaking

standing in our hallway

of our first home

 I had Bobby answer the phone because I couldn't...

 I may have been already crying with just the rush of feelings

daddy's eyes immediately welled up and a smile came across his face

 I immediately smiled after looking at him

Madison, we are so grateful for you

and so grateful that because of you

we were able to be blessed with Hayley twenty-three months later

five years later on April 10th

our little butterfly has grown up into a little girl

ready for kindergarten next year

{sigh}

you have always been so determined

focused

with every single thing you do

you have one of the biggest hearts i have ever known

kindness that is as sweet as can be

and a passion that radiates from your soul

you are the first to always offer me help

with anything and everything

and you do it with so much love

not too long ago...

Hayley was so tired and i was helping her brush her teeth

and I had just taken her sheets out of the dryer before her bedtime

and hadn't made her bed yet

i mentioned to hayley I would make her bed as soon as I was done helping her

I walked into hayley's bedroom

and you had already put her pillow and laid a blanket on Hayley's bed
for your sister

just because you wanted to help me
and do something nice for her

my heart just swelled with so much love and thankfulness

because Madison... you have such a joy when helping others

and helping your sister was the sweetest...

Madison

you 

inspire me to be better

every single day

your love language...

is definitely affirmation

and acts of service could be a close second

you are our butterfly that...

loves chocolate cupcakes/cake like her daddy

loves strawberries, oranges, and blackberries

fairy trees {broccoli and cauliflower}

"cacongos"
 {cacongos are coconut m &m's...but you call them "cacongos"}

 you love eating el fresco

 you love...

mahi mahi

gnocchi

{which you and Hayley call "p~nocchi"}

you love to help me decorate

and snuggle with me right before your bedtime

you love...

"Wednesday night" movie night

your family

friends

Jesus

Cadence

puzzles and games

you don't like to loose

especially when you and I race Daddy and Hayley into stores

{we usually always win...chuckle}
except when we lost "once"
you were not happy about that:)
neither was I:)

you are way too hard on yourself

very sensitive

loveable

stubborn

and super organized

you love to be a "fashionista"

{picking out/designing clothes}

you even dressed me for saturday before both of your birthday parties

you picked out my shoes and all my accessories

I think you could be my personal shopper 

you love white

your vintage chandelier in your bedroom

and vibrant colors

I always knew you would be a color girl

you love your sister

Hayley and you seem like long lost twins

as you two sometimes talk in your own language

you love, love the beach as much as we do

and you love to help me cook

 you usually have your foot stool by the counter

ready to help me

i love how silly you are in the car

and how you love to sing and dance to super fun songs with me

you are head over heals for Taylor Swift

and i cannot wait to surprise you this fall with her concert

I am so proud of you my sweet one

you are one of a kind

a little girl with such a big heart

Happy 5th Birthday

Madison Ella

we love you so much

xo

three...

today is a sunshine day...

my baby is three today

should I repeat that

my baby girl is three today

and today is also the day I register my oldest baby girl

for kindergarten

and Bobby is away

I'm also in full party planning mode for this weekend

and I just want to cry about it all

because it is hard

it was really hard packing up her toddler bed

and converting her to a big girl bed over the weekend

a bedroom redo I'll hopefully show you soon

about a month ago

Hayley asked for a big girl bed

and I said maybe....just *maybe* for your birthday sweetie

and before we knew it

it was all happening before we even planned
when it would happen

so I'm getting my tears out now so I can be bright and shiny for two little girls

that will come walking down stairs this morning

happy as can be that one will be registered for kindergarten and the other will now be three

we had hoped and prayed for another child when you came along, Hayley

the month before we conceived you

was a very difficult month for us ...we decided it was our last and final failed cycle
we were going to do

but when we found out about you

you gave us hope and belief that it was still possible

it was happiness and excitement

just like what we experienced with Madison
after 3 years of trying with her

from the moment we found out we were pregnant with you

I told Bobby...

"boy or girl"...

*she* is a sunshine baby

and I bet him you'd have

light brown hair and blue eyes

just like daddy

and what'd ya know...

I was right

{chuckle}

as I carried you I always called you my sunshine

and we painted your nursery pale yellow

you still love your yellow walls

{even though your walls have been yellow since you were born}

you tell us weekly how much you love them

you also love the colors purple and pink

Hayley Elisabeth, you are....

our dragonfly

a bright smiling sunshine girl with every ounce of your being

you are a lover of love

and a snuggler

physical touch I'd say is your top love language

you love to hug

cuddle

and just be close to me

all.the.time

{smile}

when you sleep

I just look at you sometimes and remember seeing you
as you looked
the night you were born

and how your features were so tiny and small then

and they still are now

I see those beautiful, long eye lashes

{sigh}
and those lips you purse

with you...

you always ask to read one more book mama

as you love to read and color

 every night you say to me...

let's bunk together

which most nights I answer no, not tonight...Hayley

but you never give up asking me
because you ask me again every single night thereafter

you are a "cover stealer" and "cover kicker-off-er" when we do bunk together

and as a matter of fact you are all over the place when you sleep
nudging and often kicking someone in the side
all accidental of course

you love vanilla and strawberry
over chocolate anyday

{just like your mama}

I give you the option

and you almost always will answer

vanilla or strawberry

 

you are as outgoing as outgoing can get

but you also have a shyness come about

if you aren't ready to show you to someone

it's all about timing with you

as with you
there is also no time but "Hayley time"

when you are done taking pictures
it means you are done
and not "one more"
even when I say pretty please to you


that is...unless I bribe you
{smile}
and the day I took these
you wanted a strawberry milkshake
I said "you got it!"

i.e...see the "no smile" in this one...

well actually this is the face you give
right before you smile when you are trying to hold a smile in

 Hayley you are a carefree little girl

every.single.time we visit Grandpa

it is really hard leaving
but when both you and Madison are with me
you two always make Grandpa and I laugh

it has me feeling grateful and so happy
about our visit with him

before we are out of the parking lot

you sometimes ask to go see him again...

or when will we see him again
at the "hosbul"

you are my non-stop talker

to almost anyone you meet

about anything on your mind....

the dentist

the repair guy you offered a valentine to

you definitely are a charmer

a lover of wearing dresses

and your precious cowgirl boots

every day...your boots are the shoes
you have to wear

no ifs, ands, or buts about it
as a matter of fact...

I think they are adorable on you

and fit you and your personality quite well

you love to run and play outside

and dine al fresco in warmer weather

you are a lover of pigtails, ponytails

pizza, macoroni, mahi mahi, strawberries, yogurt, protein shakes, bars from tj's, and cookies

it's sooo hard to say "no" to those big blues of yours
and I often find myself laughing when I'm supposed to be putting you in timeout

you are as stubborn as stubborn can get

but you had no chance with that

as both your daddy and mama are stubborn

you make us laugh with your silliness

and like to sing and dance with Madison and I in the car

you love your strawberry shortcake friends,

princess and the frog, and rapunzel characters

you are so witty and have the best comebacks

that just make us laugh and smile

you love to call people

"tootie" and "stinky pants"

and love to tease daddy by calling him"Robby"
when he is Bobby

you are so sweet and thoughtful

always thinking of others whether it's an

"I love you"

 hug

or your artwork gifts you present to us from school

you are a sensitive little soul that gets her feelings hurt easily

you look up to your big sis so much
I'll catch you just studying and watching Madison's every move

and repeating what she says

because you love to be a part of what she is doing

you two are so close

two peas in a pod

and inseparable

we really have been blessed with two very special girls

and you are such an important and beautiful part of our family

I love you my sunshine girl

you're our little dragonfly

you love life with all of your heart and soul

happiness is just all around you

I'm so ready to spend the day with you

and celebrate with family this evening

thank you for all your love and all you do even at age three
that inspires me to be better

Happy Birthday Hayley Elisabeth

many hugs and kisses to you sweetie

xo